Di Lang Ikaw

This song has nothing to do with how I feel right now.. It just reminds me of how I felt 5 years ago. Very true ang meaning specially the bridge part. Sana dati pa nagawa tong song na to.. This will tell us that pain are not being felt alone by those people that was left by their loved ones. Sometimes it's harder for those who needed to break somebody's heart coz' for some ...it really aint easy.

Pansin mo ba ang nararamdaman
Di na tayo magkaintindihan
Tila hindi na maibabalik
Tamis ng yakap at halik
Maaring tama ka
Lumalamig ang pagsinta
Sana’y malaman mong ‘di ko sinasadya

Di lang ikaw
Di lang ikaw ang nahihirapan
Damdamin ko rin ay naguguluhan

Di lang ikawDi lang ikaw ang nababahala
Bulong ng isip, ‘wag kang pakawalan
Ngunit puso ko ay kailangan kang iwan

BRIDGE:
Di hahayaang habang buhay kang saktan
Di sasayangin ang iyong panahon
Ikaw ay magiging masaya
Sa yakap at sa piling ng iba

Di lang ikawDi lang ikaw ang nahihirapan
Damdamin ko rin ay naguguluhan
Di lang ikawDi lang ikaw ang nababahala
Bulong ng isip, ‘wag kang pakawalan
Ngunit puso ko ay kailangan kang iwan

Rainbow afer the rain

I am happy now…
Started the day with a request for more sleep
Prayed very well
Talked to Him
Requested for guidance, knowledge and wisdom
Prayed for the person who hurt me to be blessed
Had a good brunch…
Heard of both not so good and good news
Went to the mall to buy some fruit and bread
Saw my ex
Went to the office
And realized that there’s this happiness in me…
God is really always there
Ready to pull you up even if you haven’t asked yet
Thank you
There’s always a rainbow after the rain

Lord I am scared, really scared.. Not for myself but for the people that I love. You know why, please give me the wisdom and the knowledge on things I can do so that I will not feel this way. I am afraid that the mistakes he/she did in the past will now need to be paid. Please guide them, lead them. Please use this situation so that they will go back and long for you. Make everyone loving them prepared of the situation that might come. And if decision needs to be made, guide us. Lord give me peace of mind, most of all give them the realization of your love for them. Make them realize that you’ve been longing for them to come back to you. Please guide us… Let us feel the joy of our salvation. I love you.

Do I have the right?

Do I really have the right to get angry, frustrated and disappointed??? It just so painful that there are people whom you have trusted so much and thought will be there turn out to be non-existence during the time you needed them most.. Real friends are not just needed during happy times.. but most of all they should and will be there in times of pain.. so where are they??? Ano ba naman ung magtext? Mangamusta? Mag-condole? I've realized, mas masakit palang tanggapin na wala mga taong ineexpect mo, or even just to show concern during a funeral kesa sa hindi sila makarating sa sarili mong wedding.. Buti na lang I have my God.. who through thick or through thin will always be there for me.. Thank you God.. Please take away this bitterness I am feeling right now. I love you God.

Ouch

Bakit may mga tao na nagddwel on their feelings of being hurt.. Pero sila sa sarili nila nde nila alam sobra silang nakakasakit?

Complacency

Another close relative of ours died and it was so sudden. We were in Laguna to celebrate my Tita Rosie’s birthday, who just passed away, when we receive a call. My Tsong Peping just died. He is not sick or anything that’s why hearing that news really shocked us. What strike me most was that I didn’t use every opportunity I had to share God’s words to him. I was so complacent. I know I had every chances God can give. Tsong Peping usually goes to our house to fix some things (he’s our local version of McGyver), or just visiting us. With his knowledge and skills in driving and mechanics we would usually go out of town with him. When we needed him we just usually text or call him and he will be there right away. But then, given those situations, there were no words came out from me to tell him how God loves him. This already happened to me, when my father’s brother, tito ver died. My greatest regret then was that I didn’t even share any God’s words to him. I’ve realized that I could have spent some time reading the bible to him. But I was so busy then.. So busy doing nothing, spending time with my so–called friends. I’m so busy thinking how to enjoy my life. How to make memories, which I thought would make my life happy in the future reminiscing it. Now, with Tsong Peping, I really never thought he will die this soon. I’ve been so relaxed believing that I will still have a lot of time. There are a lot of things he did that I don’t like, but wouldn’t that alone be a reason for me to share? I feel so selfish. I am so satisfied with my own salvation that I always neglected my greatest commission. So here I am again having the same old regret. I know I will have all the reasons not to share, or even make up one, but would those reasons be enough for me to withstand their salvation being in vain? I know I don’t have the power to save them, but God gave me the responsibility to share and making them believe is not up to me but up to the Holy Spirit. All I have to do is to talk, share. I’ve been so confident talking and discussing to our youth, who’s mostly Christians after all, why can’t I do this with my loved ones??? May the good Lord teach me and mold me to be His fishers of men. May He not allow me to lose another life without me doing what I am supposed to be doing.

How Can I Keep From Singing Your Praise

There is an endless songEchoes in my soul

I hear the music ring

And though the storms may comeI am holding onTo the rock I cling

How can I keep from singing Your praise

How can I ever say enough

How amazing is Your love

How can I keep from shouting Your name

I know I am loved by the KingAnd it makes my heart want to sing

I will lift my eyesIn the darkest night

For I know my Savior lives

And I will walk with YouKnowing You'll see me through

And sing the songs You give

I can sing in the troubled times Sing when I win

I can sing when I lose my step And fall down again

I can sing 'cause You pick me upSing 'cause You're there

I can sing 'cause You hear me, Lord When I call to You in prayer

I can sing with my last breath Sing for I know

That I'll sing with the angelsAnd the saints around the throne

Losing Someone

How to lose someone who loves you unconditionally? The first time I felt this was 3 years ago when my bestfriend Nino died. And until now there are still times that I get hurt, felt hopeless. Realized that there are things you can never really stop. No matter how much pushy you are or how much you’re like McGyver who gets his way just to get things done. When it comes to death, it’s something real, it’s something uncontrollable. Something that you need to face and slowly accept that when people died there’s no way for you to see that people again here on earth. No more…not today… not tomorrow... never… no chance… not even a little… no chance of even hearing his/her voice... No chance for you to share even just one more laughter or smile… No chance of arguing... of sharing thoughts... of defending yourself… and hearing them out… No more reminiscing with their past and telling you to learn from it... Most of all no more chance to feel the things they can uniquely do for you… Touching your heart and making you feel you are very special... you are loved… you are cared for even if you don’t listen... even if you don’t agree… even if you can’t hear them out… even if you think your better than them… It’s totally different than getting angry with somebody… committing mistakes today and got the chance to correct it tomorrow. .. Death is definite that means a permanent lost here on earth…

Thank You

To the person who have shown me appreciation... Who's whenever present, sits with the crowd and always gives a big smile to me and telling me I can do It! My most loyal fan and greatest cheerleader... I will miss you tita, Mirasol San Diego Buela ... Your ways are always an assurance that I am loved and cared for , even if I'm at my worst... With all that , how can I not tell you that you will always be my favorite tita... And how can I not miss you so badly... I love you so much.